Lost in Moments
by EchoHype
Summary: Dr. Beale and Dr. Posen have interesting jobs: they give people a chance to live. Literally. They can weave artificial memories - but there's a catch. It's the last thing the patient will ever experience. Because of this it's an operation that is only done to people on their deathbeds, to fulfill what they wish they had done with their lives, but didn't. Bechloe
1. Intro

**A/N: Mmm, this originated with an overtired idiot falling in love with a story. So I've twisted it around and fiddled with the idea I have become addicted to, bechloe style.**

* * *

_"They can take you back, Rebecca. They'll give you a second chance, they'll let you relive your life... all the way from the very beginning. Change one thing, fulfill one wish. Are you sure?_

_You know what you'd wish for, don't you?_

_But just remember... it will be the last thing you ever do."_

* * *

"Ugh, why didn't we stop for coffee on the way here, Bree?" Chloe complained, the persons report now laying ignored in her lap. "You do know we're probably going to be pulling an all-nighter. Coffee would have been a beautiful idea." She then opted to rest her head on the passenger window, shutting her eyes. Chloe could practically smell the espresso she craved.

Dr. Beale and Dr. Posen had gotten the job call already well into the evening, the two having to rush out to their destination. Unfortunately, with a job like this the hours tended to be more on the insane side.

Death won't wait for you to take a ten minute nap.

The two doctors were employed with Synston Co. which was a leading company in the medical field and its technological advancements. Their most recent breakthrough being the permanent recreation of memories, such that a patient could request attempts to alter their mind, and wake up with memories of things that actually didn't happen. Aubrey and Chloe managed to tag a spot in the program during its "Alpha phase," a huge accomplishment for two young women who had barely worked at the company before the project's start up.

Being in its alpha stages the process was known to very few, only those who had connections had heard of the project, and connections usually meant having money. A lot of money.

Stynson Co. may have developed a way in which doctors could alter memories permanently, but not everybody is cut out of for operating the equipment. More often than not it takes a huge toll on the doctors performing it. The problem was, it took an even bigger toll on the patient.

Since the memories are permanent, the conflict between the fabricated memories and the existing ones clash in such a way that it ceases the person's ability to properly function.

Creating a new memory is not as simple as pressing a button.

Aubrey sighed, "Yes, it probably would have been a good idea but we're already running late and," she glanced over at the other girl, "we have the company's ima- Chloe! You're not even doing what I asked!"

"But I'm tired," Chloe whined, reluctantly sitting back up straight. "This file doesn't even say anything about her, it only gives her name, height, eye colour... y'know stuff like that. Not even her age is in here. It doesn't have any information we'll need." Chloe smiled and nudge the girl driving, "C'mon, we're the best of the best anyway, Bree!"

The blonde opened her mouth to argue, but stopped when she noticed they had finally arrived. "Fine Chlo, we're here anyway," she said, pulling into the large driveway in front of them, "let's just hurry. I'll grab the equipment and you grab all the files." Aubrey swiftly got out of the car and went around to the back, grabbing the required machinery out and hastily slamming the trunk shut.

The patient had requested a house visit, already having moved from the hospital to their home in preparation for the two doctors showing up.

Both Chloe and Aubrey were now waiting at the door, Chloe admiring the extravagance of the house. Her eyes darted from fixture to fixture, admiring the elegance of the architecture in front of her.

Finally the front door swung open, greeting them with the sight of a brightly lit foyer along young woman in medical attire. "Hi, you two must be from Stynson, right? You can call me Cynthia Rose, I'm from the local hospital here in charge with monitoring the patient's current condition."

"Yes, I'm Dr. Posen and this is my partner, Dr. Beale. We're the specialists Stynson Co. has sent tonight." Aubrey gave the foyer a quick look around and pursed her lips together. "So, where might our patient be? We need to start setting up the equipment pronto. Looks like this place can handle a lot of power being used, seeing as there are so many lights left on wasting energy anyway, so I don't think we'll be needing to head back for that generator," she finished, directing the side note to her partner.

"Ah... um right well," the other doctor shifted uncomfortably from Aubrey's comment, "we've set up in the patient's bedroom. Right now we're working hard to keep her stable, at this point she's not conscious so I hope that doesn't affect the process. The bedroom is just up this flight of stairs, follow me then." Cynthia rose then turned, leading the doctors to where the patient was waiting for them, not checking to see if they followed.

Aubrey and Chloe looked at each other before the blonde nodded and began to follow the woman.

"Nice house," Aubrey noted as she stepped through the doorway. "What is our patient's name again?" she said, turning to Chloe.

Chloe closed the door and pulled out the folder from under her arm, flipping it open to the first page.

"Rebecca Mitchell."


	2. Chapter 1 - Second Chances

Cynthia Rose had led the two specialists down a hallway, towards what one could only assume to be the master bedroom. "Okay, Beca's here. Shall we?" she said, and opened the door.

"Wait," Aubrey commanded. "Beca? Are we dealing with a kid here? Were we actually called to perform this on a child?"

"Oh, no. No girl," she chuckled. "No she just prefers… or preferred being called Beca. Now we really don't have time to waste so I would set up whatever you need to already. She's been prepped so we're ready for you do yo' thang." Cynthia Rose gestured in front of her and entered the room and left them behind in the hallway.

Chloe and Aubrey exchanged confused glances before heading in after. The place was cluttered with medical equipment- wires and tubes all leading towards the bed, where Beca laid. The constant beeping and buzzing matched with the sight made the comforting decor rendered useless. Three or four medical personnel floated back and forth between the machinery keeping the girl alive.

The redhead concluded that Rebecca Mitchell, or Beca, had to be around the same age as her and Aubrey, and that made her terribly uneasy. Chloe walked over to the bedside and inspected the monitors. "So… what exactly happened here, and who exactly is our patient?" she questioned, doing a once over of the unconscious girl. Chloe was unable to shake the feeling she looked really familiar.

"You seriously don't know who she is?" piped one of the medical personnel, shocked that Chloe was so clueless. "This is the Beca Anne."

"Stacie! Don't be rude." Cynthia Rose smiled nervously at Chloe. The redhead just smiled, mouthing that it was okay.

Stacie huffed before turning back to her work. "Just saying," she mumbled.

"Beca Anne, as in the music producer?" Aubrey questioned, scribbling a few things down.

"Yup, that'd be it Dr. Posen." Cynthia Rose nodded. "It was a car crash earlier today. We think the damage is too significant for her to make it through. But we've managed to get everything stable enough to artificially prolong her life for approximately another day, maybe a little longer, as per the patient's final request - along with calling you. The pain she's enduring right now from the process has caused her to fall unconscious though."

Aubrey continued to jot down notes on the clipboard she had clutched in her left arm. "That's plenty of time. I'm positive we'll be able to complete the memory alteration with time to spare." she stated, before heading into another series of questions about Beca's medical history.

As Aubrey continued gathering information, Chloe stared at Beca on the bed. Knowing the woman was famous should have made her uneasy feeling vanish, but it was still there. This feeling didn't come from watching someone on screen or listening to their work. It was as if Chloe was intimately connected with this person, someone she was certain she had never met in her entire life. It made the redhead's stomach crawl and her chest hurt, and the impracticality of it all made her feel even more off-kilter than usual.

She always felt weird doing this job, meeting each new subject. Because that's what they were, subjects. It just made it look more ethical since they were going to die anyway. Her and Aubrey were the best technicians in the company, and even they didn't fully know what this machine was fully capable of yet. The idea of essentially killing someone as her profession made the young specialist queasy, even if they were fulfilling a "wish" in the process. Chloe just wanted to make people happy. All these people, everyone she had worked on so far, they were test subjects.

It was something about this exact situation though, that made her hair stand on end.

"Dr. Beale!"

A hand on her shoulder and the calling of her name quickly snapped Chloe out of her daze. She turned and was met with the assistant that had spoken to her earlier, Stacie if she remembered correctly.

"Coffee!" Chloe gasped, as Stacie presented the heavenly liquid to the other girl. "Thank you, I was dying for some, oh my god."

The other girl shrugged, "Thought you might need some, overheard your friend there said you'll probably have to pull an all-nighter. Welcome to the club. Hey, can I ask you something?"

"Sure, go ahead," she said, sipping the beverage, not caring if the scalding liquid burned or not.

Stacie gestured over to the two metal suitcases that both her and Aubrey had brought in with them. "So… look okay how does this exactly work then," she questioned, "like, what do you do?"

"Well, it's kind of complicated," Chloe started, unsure of how to explain.

"Go on, it's not like your friend is going to be finished drilling Cynthia with questions over there anytime soon," Stacie commented, pointing to the duo behind her.

The young doctor let out a small chuckle at the sight of Cynthia Rose sweating under all the information Aubrey was squeezing out of her. "Okay well um…" she bit her lip, "the technology requires us to actually step into the memories of the patient, which are reconstructed as interactive scenes. Following me so far?"

The tall brunette nodded, encouraging the girl to continue.

"So we traverse backwards through the memories of the patient's life, usually it's very gradual as we have to connect and jump between memories that link to each other. What we have to do is go all the way back, until we reach childhood - at which point, the wish of the patient in present time would be transferred over."

"Okay but, how does that change anything," Stacie asked, confused. "How does presenting them with their wish at childhood actually make it come true?"

Chloe paused, trying to find the right way to explain to the other girl how it changes things. "Umm… as we grow up, we lose the drive to do a lot of things. Life gets in the way and things come up, and sometimes we forget what we really want. Sometimes we realize things too late. Our job is to give them the push they need," she started, "You would be surprised what someone can accomplish if they work towards that one goal their entire life. We give them that drive to succeed, but they do it all themselves. We give them a second chance at their life, really."

"So they fulfil their own wish?"

"Kind of," the redhead shrugged, "from our influence, if we do our job right, the patient could lead an entire different life inside their head, working towards and fulfilling their dying wish themselves. If all goes well, they wake up, having lived the dream life they never had. They get to embrace a brief moment of fulfillment."

"Wow," Stacie breathed out. "Then that means they die not knowing any of it wasn't real?"

"Exactly."

"Chloe! I need you over here now," Aubrey called. Chloe turned to see their equipment already calibrated and Aubrey sitting in front of the screens. She smiled to Stacie before heading over to her partner, thanking her again for the coffee.

"What's up Bree, we ready to go yet?" she said as she walked up to Aubrey's side.

"Yes, almost. We're just waiting for Cynthia Rose to give us the patient's wish," the blonde said, keeping her eyes on the vitals menu in front of her. "Look, Chlo I think it's best if you go in alone this time and I stage the controls. It seems like Beca's current state isn't as stable as they thought it was and I'm going to have to maneuver this thing with extreme precision. I don't think I can do a good enough job if I'm in there with you… so be careful, alright? I'll be there for the initial memory, but after that I'll just be monitoring your progress from out here."

"Got it, Bree." Chloe grinned and nudged the blonde, "Remember, we're the best of the best. I think I can handle it."

Aubrey let a smile crack through on her features, "God, you're such a goof sometimes. Can you ever stay focused?"

Chloe saw Cynthia Rose's braided hair come into view as she approached the two of them, holding a crumpled note. She attempted to smooth it out before she handed it to Aubrey. "This is what she wrote in the hospital, right after the accident. She said it was urgent and demanded we gave her stationary. Right after she asked us to call you."

The blonde took the note and began to scan it's contents

"What does it say?" Chloe questioned.

"It's the location of her songbook with a page number, and that the song should now be called 'Born a Stranger.'" the doctor relayed. "It says 'to write lyrics for Born a Stranger and sing it at the Starry Night Festival.'" Aubrey put the note down. "Born a Stranger? What the hell kind of wish is this, she's already a famous music producer why would this be her wish… isn't that a small festival held at some university?"

The redhead went and picked up the note. "Sing? Wait I read somewhere that Beca Anne never sings. That she refuses to… right?"

Cynthia Rose nodded at the comment, "Yeah, it's a thing or whatever. She doesn't like singing, sticks to producing and remixing." She took the connection device from Aubrey and proceeded to attach it to their patient, flipping it's switch and causing it to glow a faint orange colour, "Guess she had a last minute change of heart."

"Whatever the reason, it's our job to make that happen. Chloe, put on your gear already, we have to start we don't have any time to waste." Aubrey commanded, flipping the switches on the command panel in front of her. She picked up a piece of headgear and put it on, a thick piece of black glass wrapping around her field of vision. The blonde hit the last switch and the headgear began to glow the same colour as the connector on Beca. "Database has connected and is recalling the last known stable memory. We are at standby. Dr. Beale, you set?"

Chloe scanned the note one more time before placing it down next to the unconscious girl. She picked up her own headgear and went to go sit down on the sofa positioned across from the bed. Her stomach was on edge and something still felt off but she continued to place the piece of technology on her head, flicking its own switch on.

"Ready to connect, Dr. Posen. Reconstruction of stable memory number one may commence."


	3. Chapter 2 - A Story in Reverse

**A/N**: **So here starts the beginning of our journey folks! It's where ya finally start going through Beca's memory (and seriously to write this chapter I had this one song on repeat like 71 times to try and keep me focused ngl)**

* * *

Chloe had determined very early on in the job she would never get used to the feeling of entering someone's memories. The sensation left her disorientated. She could compare it to anything she had experienced before. It was the feeling of her stomach when an elevator ascends too quickly mixed with the impact of awaking from a dream in which she was falling. How it never managed to affect Aubrey was a mystery to the girl, because it always knocked the wind out of Chloe and left her gasping for air.

Luckily for her she was able to catch her breath as she found herself sitting down in the exact same spot she had been in moments ago, the sofa now facing an empty bed.

The once lively bedroom now felt bare, the lights out and the people gone. Looking around, she realized just how big the room actually was, all the wires and machinery now nowhere to be seen. The place looked almost too neat, too organized. In all honesty, it didn't even seem like it was lived in. Her blood chilled at the eerie new feeling the room gave off in its current state. It wasn't until Aubrey began to walk across the room, visibility and interactivity settings turned off, that Chloe notice they weren't alone.

In the far corner sat a still figure hunched over the desk, as if frozen in their spot - their elbows propped up and head buried in their hands. It was unnatural how still this person was, their breathe shallow enough to not even make a sound. The figure was most definitely the owner of the house and seeing her in this state made the doctor's stomach twist. Chloe got up from where she was and eased over to where Aubrey stood beside the producer, positioning herself to see what exactly was on the desk in front of Beca.

As Chloe got closer, she saw a small wooden box come into view. The lid was hung open, only one of its hinges fully intact. Its contents were dented and disjointed, but she could see a few of the pieces spinning, forced to work in vain, trying to accomplish its purpose as the box's lid remained off.

"What is-"

"It's a music box." Aubrey cut off her partner's question. "Well, a broken music box if you want to be more specific."

Chloe turned back to the girl staring at the broken box, her position still the same as when they first entered the memory. Her eyes scanned the rest of the desk and caught sight of a stack of plain notebooks, keys, and several empty bottles of what she could only assume to be some sort of alcohol.

The redhead quickly scanned the room for some sort of indication of what time it was. No clocks were in the room and it looked like there was a huge effort to block any outside light from coming in, leaving no ability to know if was night out or not. "Bree, what's the timestamp on this memory?" Chloe found herself whispering, despite knowing that only Aubrey would be able to hear her.

"Says here it's currently 09:56." The doctor scoffed. "Sure doesn't seem like it in here, the woman really doesn't... wait if it's..." Aubrey moaned, "We can't even use this as a start point! Well awesome what a waste of time, seriously we already have a long night ahead of us. Just great."

"Bree, what are you even talking..." Chloe trailed off as she witnessed Beca slowly attempt get up from where she sat, stumbling off balance as she swiped the box and the set of keys off the surface in front of her.

A distortion rippled through as the scene in front of them started to disappear as the distortions got heavier, leaving the two doctors to watch the room fade to black. The distinct click from Aubrey's precise steps echoed throughout the now completely dark surroundings.

"You don't get it? Chlo, this is earlier today."

Before the redhead could respond, that familiar feeling struck the woman as she felt herself catapulted into the next part of the memory. Chloe gasped for breath, the sudden rip forward giving her no chance to brace herself for the move. Gathering her bearings, she noticed that her and Aubrey were in the backseat of a car. A moving car. She went to take a look out the window, but all she saw was a blur of colours - the result of Beca's memory not latching onto the surroundings.

Beca was driving. The young star was gripping the steering wheel so hard Chloe was almost certain that it was going to get torn straight off the dashboard. She noticed that Beca's gaze kept flickering to the passenger seat, and found that the object from the desk was resting there. Her speed never decreased as she made a sharp left turn, the old music box now falling to the car's floor, the keepsake now completely destroyed. The sound of it hitting the ground caused Beca duck her head and let out a frustrated cry, pushing her foot on the accelerator even more.

"Bree, I don't get what... oh." The sudden realization hit the girl and that same feeling crept up into her stomach. This time though it wasn't because of jumping through memories. Her heart started to race at the implications of the situation they were in.

Chloe could practically hear Beca continuing to push down harder on the gas pedal.

She turned to her left to see Aubrey leaning against the window clearly disinterested in what was going on, her legs crossed and lips pursed as she calmly watching the pigments outside her window swirl together.

Aubrey's disconnection with the scene caused Chloe's emotions to escalate and she found herself frantically switch her gaze from her partner back to Beca. Anxiety gripped her chest as she watched the girl further break, knowing fully how this scene would turn out, the girl showing no signs of slowing.

Before she knew it, she saw the star's body snap forward with a terrifying force and the last thing she heard was the screeching of brakes and the cringe-worthy sounds of metal on metal as everything became black.

* * *

A familiar beeping filled Chloe's ears as she slowly opened her eyes to find that she was on the producer's sofa, room back to being filled with equipment and people in scrubs floating back and forth between screens. Chloe had never experienced someone's memory of death before, and she still couldn't grasp the whole moment. She shakily took off her headgear and placed it down on the cushion next to her.

"Dr. Beale, a-are you okay, girl? You look really pale..." She heard Cynthia Rose rush from her station, concern coating her words. "Do you need some water?"

Aubrey's commanding voice washed over the room. "Chloe, put your connector back on. We don't have time for a break. We've already wasted enough time hitting that dead end."

Cynthia Rose looked over at the blonde woman. "Hey, she doesn't look like she's okay to go back in there... maybe take five or something?"

"I'm sorry, are you a specialist employed with Stynson?" Aubrey turned to glare at the African-American. "Are you a licensed operator of this machine? If either of those answers are no, I would recommend you don't suggest courses of action for me to take." With that Aubrey turned her focus back to the display in front of her.

Cynthia Rose shot an apologetic look back to Chloe, and mouthed if she was okay or not. The redhead smiled and waved it off. She didn't know why her body was reacting like this anyway, and even though it was harsh, Aubrey was right. Chloe looked over to the girl on the bed, Beca's condition would only be this stable for so long. They didn't have time to spare.

"I'm rerouting to the next stable memory I can acquire. Hopefully we'll be able to initiate there... I don't think I can take anymore setbacks."

As soon as the young doctor placed the equipment back on her head, in Aubrey's rush, she was immediately thrust back into Beca's memories.

* * *

"Since the last attempt was a bust, I'm here. But remember after we find a link, you're travelling back on your own, got it?"

Chloe was barely able to catch her breath before Aubrey began walking down the dirt path in front of them. "How does she do this..." the girl mumbled to herself before running to catch up with the blonde.

Following down the path, it eventually opened up into a small clearing. It was a lookout point, showcasing the view of the entire city below it. Leaning over the small railing was none other than Beca, silently taking in the view underneath.

The young producer put out the cigarette in her hands and proceeded to shove her hands into her jacket pockets, and turned to leave. Her gaze left the ground and she was surprised to see the two doctors in front of her.

"Oh... hi," she started. "I uhm, nobody ever comes up here. Sorry I was just leaving." Beca quickly brought her attention back down to her boots, but Chloe had caught the wet stains down her cheeks.

"Hello, Beca correct?"

"Yeah," her expression hardened, "I'm Beca Anne. Though, if you're going to ask for an autograph I'm going to have to disappoint you." The girl attempted to walk away, head still down, but Aubrey stepped in front of her.

"No, that's not what we're here for. I am Dr. Posen and my partner here is Dr. Beale. Are you aware of the Stynson Agency for the Regeneration of Life?" Aubrey began to recite. Leave it to her to waste no time, Chloe thought.

Beca lifted her head to meet Aubrey's eyes, confusion and annoyance written over her face. "Look I don't know what you're trying-"

Chloe stepped forward and cut in, "The memory experiment rumors... those. Have you heard about them?" She tried to sound as friendly as possible, knowing they probably looked less than legitimate in this setting.

The brunette still wasn't quite sure what was going on and was still confused, but she eased up a little.

"... Mmm, my manager mentioned it to me," Beca cautiously said as her eyes scanning both women suspiciously. "Told me all about how they can let you fix your life 'n stuff before you die, all you had to do was call."

"Well, you've already called us," Aubrey stated, "and we're going to need your assistance If we're going to be successful in fulfilling your requests."

Instantly, Beca froze, her eyes widening at the woman's words. "Wait... I don't..." She started to back up, only to be met with the railing she was once leaning on, quickly having to grab onto it to avoid falling over.

The blonde sighed, "I really do not want to have to reboot this memory. So please, be careful. We already had to go through your accident and my patience is running thin tonight."

Aubrey's words caused even more panic, as Beca continued to clutch onto the railing as firmly as she could. "So I'm- what you mean to say is..."

"Not yet." Chloe moved to place a hand on the brunette's shoulder. "You're still alive - sort of." The look on her face became unreadable as she stared back into bright blue eyes.

"We're here to travel back through to your childhood and plant the wish's roots. The problem is it's too far back to do in one memory jump. We'll need an object of importance to link us to another moment in your life," Aubrey continued. "That's why we need your help"

Without saying a word, Beca reached into her jacket and pulled out a small leather notebook and handed it to Chloe. It was old and worn, it's bind becoming loose and it's cover a little torn with "Songs" written in the centre. The redhead opened up the cover to see "Beca" scribbled on the top corner with "Anne" printed underneath. She stared at it for a second before handing it back to the producer.

"But... what about my privacy?"

"We'll try the best we can not to invade on unneeded events," Chloe reassured, "but honestly it cannot be helped if you want us to fulfill our contract. It's not something we can avoid."

The brunette turned to look over her shoulder, down to the cityscape below, the situation starting to sink in. The girl continued in silence for a while continuing to stare down at the busy night streets, but surprisingly when Beca spoke again, her voice was hard. "So I must have wished for something for you two to be here, right?"

Beca had lost the break in her voice, but Chloe noticed how distanced the look in her eyes had become. She was stuck on how dull and empty they looked, just like back with the music box and continued to stare as Beca's attention was now on Aubrey as she awaited her answer.

"To rename one of your songs and sing it at some festival," Aubrey dismissively said.

"It would help if we knew why though, Beca," Chloe said bringing the girl's gaze back to her, hand back on her shoulder. "We can't fulfill the wish, but you might be able to. Our job is to only give you the push you need."

"I don't know."

The doctor gave the girl a bewildered look. "You don't know? This is your deathbed wish, how can you not know why?" Aubrey said, clearly not happy.

"Look, I don't know," she spat, "but I gave you that book. I don't know why I would have wished that but I'm helping anyway, alright?" Beca glared back at the tall blonde. "I do have a question though... if I'm...you said something about rebooting and I'm confused. How am I seeing you guys right now?"

Aubrey clicked her tongue against her cheek in annoyance. "This is all a reconstruction of your life's past events - almost comparable to an interactive simulation. For example if you had fallen off that cliff behind you in reaction to the knowledge we presented you with, I would then have to do something similar to 'rewinding' this portion of the memory, however time consuming that may be."

"So... what does that make me?" Beca turned back over to the view below.

Chloe opened her mouth to speak but shut it again. Her words were stuck in her throat at how Beca sounded when she had asked that question. She had never had an actual conversation like in the reconstructions before. What was she supposed to say?

Before Chloe could even think up of a way to respond, Aubrey had beat her to it.

"You're essentially a program - you're not real."

"Bree!"

"What Chloe?" the blonde questioned, "It's true, and it doesn't matter if it upsets her or not. It's not like we need to cater a program"

Beca's face had fallen blank, and the expression was so alike the one from before that Chloe felt the frantic emotions from before flood back. She didn't know why she kept getting these vibes, but they gripped at her chest.

"If you really thought that, why did you even bother explaining anything to her?" Chloe shot back at her partner.

Aubrey looked back at the redhead, unable to retort. "I'm finished here. Use the notebook to start to traverse. I need to get back to focusing on the command display. I'll keep in contact with you."

Chloe heard the other girl mumble a few things in frustration before her figure distorted and disappeared.

"Is what she said true?"

Dark blue eyes met Chloe's and her words caught in her throat again.

"I'm not real, am I?"

All Chloe could do was shake her head, staring into the eyes that bore into hers. "Sorry, I-"

"No, it's okay... just, here." Beca handed Chloe the notebook back as she half-smiled in encouragement, but her voice hollow. "I hope you succeed."

Chloe nodded and reached out for the book. She forced a smile out in return.

"I hope you succeed as well."


	4. Chapter 3 - Of Blood & Blame

**A/N: Hey guys sorry it's been a while. I wasn't able to update but I have a bunch of chapters ready now. I just need to know, would you guys like each chapter to be a separate memory, or would you like to have multiple memories in one chapter? Let me know~ And hopefully enjoy!**

* * *

When Chloe grasped the tattered notebook it disappeared and she felt the familiar lurch in her stomach as she was sent back, watching Beca's broken smile fade as the memento pulled her away. It looked like the jump had brought her back to the producer's house, specifically, back to the woman's bedroom.

Beca didn't seem to be there this time though.

As Chloe looked around the room, she still was astounded at how barren it really was. There were no photographs or paintings on the walls and it looked like the bed hadn't been slept in for quite some time. It was as if nobody lived in this room. Chloe turned to the corner desk that she had seen Beca at before and discovered that the music box from before was also in this memory.

Crossing the room, she now stood in front of the ornate box. It has been placed directly in the centre of the space as if positioned for display. Now getting a closer look she saw that the wooden casing was still just as damaged as when she had seen it before. It was chipping in places and there was a corner that was completely smashed. She had a feeling that it was still broken as well, that no music would play out if tried. Despite its physical imperfections, the large trinket was still stunning. Chloe couldn't imagine how elegant it must have looked back when it was in mint condition.

Right next to the music bo was the worn out notebook she had just previously used to get here. It was positioned the same way as the box, perfectly angled as if never to be touched.

Chloe stood there for a while, forgetting that she was here for other reasons, and continued to look at the only two personal items in the entire room. Realizing again that she needed to find Beca, she broke her gaze from the belongings on the desk and made to exit the room

From downstairs she heard a doorbell echo throughout the house and quickly made her way toward the main foyer. As she started down the stairs she was suddenly startled by Aubrey's voice.

_"Chloe! You don't have any of your visibility functions off, you're going to ruin the memory!"_

The redhead cursed quietly and turned her interactivity and visibility off just in time, as she witnessed BEca emerge from another hallway to answer the door.

_"Thanks Bree, I completely blanked there." _

Aubrey's voice echoed through her head again, the strain of commanding the machine evident in her words.

_"No problem Chlo. Just please pay more attention we really don't have time to reboot, especially since we're only on the first jump. Remember we must represent Stynson as their best specialists."_

Sending back an apology, Chloe got back to work, moving to where the front door was.

Beca sluggishly made her way towards her goal, having no regard for the person waiting on the other side of it. Chloe watched and wondered when exactly she became this way - somebody so successful and praised, reduced o a reclusive mes. Well, she thought, she'd find out anyway.

The brunette opened the door and if Chloe thought Beca's expression was low before well it got worse.

"Oh," was all that left the sort woman's lips.

"What? Is that the reaction your dear friend Fat Amy should receive?"

Beca had turned to head deeper into the house, leaving the boisterous woman to let herself in. She sighed. "Amy, after all these years why do you still insist on that nickname?" Her speech was drawn out, as if speaking stole too much breath from her chest, no energy present. "You continue to be so immature, you know. You haven't changed."

Amy just laughed and moved to put her hand on Beca's shoulder. "Well yuhh, it's what life's about, _Beca Anne_," Amy spurted as she fluctuated her voice on the woman's stage name. "It's still funny so I'm still gonna use it. Never gets old. At one time you even could call me that."

The other woman scoffed. "Yeah well, I did a lot of things 'once upon a time.'"

"C'mon flat-butt, lighten your ass up a bit. It's killing my humour cells to see you like this."

The two had migrated to the star's kitchen and now Beca was opening up a fresh bottle of wine.

Amy watched with a fallen face at her friend's attempt at the bottle. "Beca do you know what time it is?"

"You may not be the smartest Aussie I know, but I thought at least you could read a clock." Beca spat, pouring herself a glass of red.

The look of shock that went over Amy's face told Chloe that Beca had never acted that way towards her before. As uncomfortable as this was for her, it was her job to pay attention to events, no matter how much they made her stomach churn.

"Beca I— everyone is worried about you." Amy's playful tone was gone and her features had lost their lightness.

With no response, the producer just sat at her kitchen island, staring into her glass. After giving what Beca thought was a thorough swirl, she downed the entire glass. "I'm fine," Beca choked out, gesturing to her surroundings.

"No, you're_ 'successful'_ you're not_ 'fine.'_ God— Beca look at what you're doing to yourself. You've twisted up all your heart-guts and left them that way." The Australian moved to the young star's side. "Can't you see it, what you're doing?" Amy questioned as Beca poured another glass, "think about how we feel, we care. Jesse—"

There was a shar crushing noise and Chloe's eyes went wide at the sight of Beca's hand. She had destroyed the wine glass, it's contents now covering the kitchen island and herself, blood mixing indistinguishably with the other liquid as it dropped from all surfaces.

"Don't you dare—"

"Beca, I just—"

"No," Beca commanded, her voice eerily calm compared to the venom that dripped from every word. "You do not get to bring Jesse into this. I don't care. How dare you, you know exactly what we went through and how I feel about the subject." She pulled out a piece of glass from her hand.

"Beca, I only meant that—" Amy tried to start but Beca gave the other woman a look that had both Amy and Chloe completely paralyzed.

"Do you think I don't know what I'm like?" Beca started to scream. "I think about it every day, what went down."

Amy's expression softened at the scene. This wasn't the strong girl she used to know. "I was just trying—"

"No Amy, get out." Beca didn't even glance up at her visitor, plucking out the shards of glass one by one. "I have to be at the studio in an hour so I will need you to leave."

Reluctantly, Amy let herself out, looking back a couple times at the broken figure at the island on her way.

"Beca, we love you. Remember that." Giving the last statement Amy turned and shut the door behind her.

_"Aubrey, what's the timestamp on this?"_ Chloe sent toward Aubrey.

Her partner's voice bounced through her head._ "Day before the accident."_

With Amy gone, Beca continued to just stare at the mess in front of her. The scene made Chloe's heart twist, as she remembered the crash. She had a feeling before that it was intentional, but now she was sure of it.

Beca stood up and reached for a new glass, the injury on her hand not even being attended to. She brought the glass and new alcohol back to the island and sat back in front of her mess, throwing from her pocket her work pass on the surface in front of her. Beca then shot a quick text to the studio saying she wouldn't be coming before downing another glass.

The scene stayed the same for quite some time as Chloe just watched the broken girl continue her self destruction before Beca got up and walked toward the piano nearby. Chloe stayed by the island, watching the producer start to play a tune off heart. The music coming off the instrument made Chloe's chest tighten and her head feel light. Something was wrong but she didn't know what.

In frustration, Beca yelled and smashed her fists against the keys, now covered in blood, and proceeded to just stare straight ahead before starting to sob, putting her head down on the keys.

Peeling her eyes from the sight, Chloe noticed a slight discolouration of the brunette's work pass, no longer looking like it belonged in this place, like as if almost all the colour was drained from the item.

Chloe immediately knew there was nothing left to do in this memory, which honestly, she was thankful for. She didn't know if she could stand to watch Beca like this any longer.

****Moving forward, she went to pick up the work pass. Immediately her surroundings froze and everything turned to black as the scene itself was sucked into the memento Chloe grasped in her hand.


	5. Chapter 4 - Always Remember

"Okay, Omar let's take it from the top. I need to feel more emotion." Beca's voice rang through the studio as the rapper prepped himself to start again. "I don't just give my personal songs to anyone, I know you can come through and prove to me you deserve this song."

Chloe found herself at what must be Beca's workplace, the badge she used now hanging from the producer neck. She was busy directing an artist that was currently in the booth, and was expertly turning knobs and sliding other bits as she instructed the young musician.

"I'm going to start the track," Beca stated, "you know when to come in."

With that music filled the studio as a female voice came over the speakers

_Light me up a cigarette and put it in my mouth_

_You're the only one that wants me around_

_And I can think of a thousand reasons why_

_I don't believe in you, I don't believe in you and I_

As the lyrics started the redhead felt the same familiarity as when the brunette had played the piano in the last memory. She became lightheaded and had to keep herself up by holding onto the counter she was next to. This definitely wasn't something that's happened in previous jobs.

_"Bree, what do my vitals look like?"_ Chloe questioned, her voice breathy and thick with worry.

A quick reply was shot back, Aubrey's voice booming, _"Vitals are in perfect condition, no red flags here. I can't seem to find the problem. Are you okay?"... Wait. The command central core is acting weird. It seems to be fluctuating."_

Chloe continued to lean against the counter and tried to regain her breath. _"Well whatever it is, it's affecting me."_

_"It's not showing on your vitals though, that's the thing,"_ Aubrey stated, _"This is something I've never encountered. Try and push through, my system says you're not actually in any danger so go ahead."_

Right after the quick exchange, the female voice faded out and the artist in the booth cut in.

_Go ahead and fill my drink up, you'll still be all I think of_

_We try and stay afloat, but know the way to sink us_

_I say the problem's solved once you forget the question_

_But you go ask again 'cause you ain't learned your lesson_

Beca bobbed her head along with the beat as the musician continued on with the verse, intently watching the man she has previously called "Omar." She continued to move and press things on the multiple panels in front of her. Chloe laughed, making a note how her and Aubrey both had the same concentration face. It wasn't until then that she noticed that she was feeling normal again.

"Alright, finish up the verse strong," Beca commanded through the microphone into the booth as.

_'Cause I can write a song but can't unwrite my wrongs_

_I guess you live and learn, learn when the love is gone_

Once the last lines were rapped, the producer told the artist he was done for the day, and motioned for him to exit the booth.

"So, how's it coming Beca?" Omar questioned, hands nervously in his pockets.

Beca smirked, "With that revision of the first verse we're done. Here I've already mashed together that verse from 'Gopher Guts' by Aesop Rock. It matches perfectly."

With that she flicked a switch and slid up some buttons on the panel directly in front of her and let the first verse play and fade into the remix.

_I'm not gonna rot, no, fuck that snot_

_You can let them let you rot, man_

_But I'm not going to watch_

_I'm not gonna stand atop your plot_

_I love you friend, but I'm just not_

_On the other hand if your ashes are scattered in the sea_

_I will swim in the sea and you'll be with me_

_And if your shit is scattered at the roots of a tree_

_I will climb that tree_

Right after the last line Omar's voice boomed over the speakers again as he spat out the second verse having it cut off abruptly

_The champagne's on the dresser, empty from all my efforts_

_The life of yesterday's party gets carried off on a stretcher_

_And here we standing like everything's how we planned it_

_But who're we kidding? We drinking so we don't panic..._

Beca messed around with the panel again and mixed in the other song to end the verse, the transition practically flawless.

_And they call to let you know your friend is dead in a box_

_Everything you think you're hiding shows_

_In the way you view the graves like a string of tiny thrones_

_Messages you'd tucked away for keeps has resurfaced to be heard_

Bringing the mix to an end, the music died down and Beca spun around to face Omar and the rest of the team. "So, how's that for another hit?" Beca smirked at them as she leaned against the counter behind her.

Omar came up to shake her hand, "Thank you so much for signing me and my two friends, and thanks again for letting us use one of your own songs for our debut, like shit man, I don't know how to thank you."

The producer laughed as Omar continued to excitedly shake her hand. "You can thank me by continuing to go through your music career with the emotion I signed you for, alright? You're gonna make it big, I can tell."

"Know what this calls for? A night out, on me!" Beca yelled across the room.

The occupants of the studio cheered and proceeded to file out of the small room.

"Y'know I don't understand why you don't sing."

Beca jumped and cursed at the voice suddenly next to her. "Christ, Amy. You're going to give me a heart attack." She shook her head as she continued to lean back and watch her employees, Omar, and the other two members of Zeds Dead leave the studio.

"Mhm, so when are you going to tell them that your voice is on their track?" Amy questioned, giving Beca a sly look.

"Nobody needs to know," came Beca's response. Her voice hard as she glared at the woman beside her.

Amy sighed, "Right, right. But here's the thing listen, like I don't get why your flat-butt doesn't make an album. It doesn't make sense to me y'know?"

"I don't have any intention to sing... AND nobody can know I sang vocals for Zeds Dead, okay?" Beca looked at Amy pleadingly. "It's just, remember that night I found them? Their vocalist reminded me of what I've been through, what we've been through and I just... they need me. So I lent them my voice. Can we just drop it and get drunk?," Beca sighed out, "I could really go for getting drunk."

"Okay," Amy agreed, "We can go get drunk. Just one more question."

"Fine, shoot."

Amy got up from beside the producer. "Why'd you give them that song? It must have been hard for you to even hear it being played back. You and I both know that I know what that song means to you and who it's about. So why?"

"Because," Beca started, "because with Omar's passion I knew he'd make it great. And yeah it goddamn hurts to hear it. But he made us hurt right? Sometimes you just need to feel that certain smart, that paralyzing grip on your chest. It reminds me that I need to remember. I always need to remember."

With that the pair got up and headed towards the door as Amy promised, leaving Chloe alone in the studio.

The memory froze as it ended and the doctor stood there, questions swimming around in her head. Chloe was always curious, she always did get too absorbed in her client's lives. Watching how things end up the way they are, in the end. Rebecca Mitchell's life was turning out to be a gold mine for the doctor, or it should have been. Something was off and Chloe couldn't tell what. It didn't feel like it was the memories themselves.

Chloe had never experienced what she had in this particular memory, and it frightened her. It happened to a lesser degree previously in Beca's memories, just feeling off or slightly dizzy as if she was dehydrated. But this had scared her. Aubrey said that nothing was coming up on her vitals and that's what she was mulling over.

Could there be something wrong with the machine?

The doctor sighed, putting her worries aside and moved towards the mixing station which had the familiar discolouration that mementos did, and thought back on the client herself and her apparent self-destruction as she prepared to jump to the next memory.

* * *

**AN: Sorry for the short chapter but short memories tend to happen that way. This was just build up to the bigger chapter I have planned uhuhuhuhuhuh but yeah hopefully you weren't THAT disappointed with this one and you stick around for what I have in store~**


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